The one question that always leaves me stumped for words is “why are you still single?” Sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeit, where do I start? I mean I think I’m cute, funny and caring. I can tell a great story and I’m a great dresser, I can cut some pretty mad shapes on the d-floor and cook up a tasty meal BUT (there’s always a but) where are all the single, witty, INTELLIGENT
lead singers men? I feel like given the right formula anything is possible.
I stumbled upon this article, How to Fall In Love With Anyone, and I was super intrigued. In it it talks about Mandy Len Catron who replicated an old study by psychologist Arthur Aron in which he tested the possibility of two strangers falling in love. Is it possible to CHOOSE to fall in love? My simple answer? Of course!
Essentially what the experiment did was take a heterosexual man and woman, strangers to each other, who sit in a room across from one another and answer a series of 36 questions (36!! they’re listed below) and then finally sit silently staring into each others eyes for four minutes.
In Aron’s original study the couple ended up getting married, and in Catron’s experiment she’s still dating the guy months later. So what I’m saying is WHO WANTS TO SIT IN A ROOM WITH ME AN ANSWER SOME QUESTIONS?!!
But seriously*, I believe first and foremost that the couple HAVE to be attracted to each other, I don’t care what you say, there has to be something alluring about the other person. I don’t think it could work if there wasn’t a spark of initial sexual attraction. Once there’s a glimmer of bewitchery in the air then of course it’s possible for a pair of strangers to fall in love at the end of it. Especially if you’re speaking honestly and with an open heart.
At the core of it, when you strip back all the bullshit and game playing that I’ve encountered in the dating world and have a pair of single, willing and available participants then I think you do have a recipe for love.
What do you think? Is it possible for a couple of strangers to fall in love by the end of an experiment? If so, do you have any single, HOT friends??
Here are the 36 questions used in the experiment:
1. Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?
2. Would you like to be famous? In what way?
3. Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say? Why?
4. What would constitute a “perfect” day for you?
5. When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else?
6. If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year-old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you want?
7. Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die?
8. Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common.
9. For what in your life do you feel most grateful?
10. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?
11. Take four minutes and tell your partner your life story in as much detail as possible.
12. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or ability, what would it be?
13. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?
14. Is there something that you’ve dreamt of doing for a long time? Why haven’t you done it?
15. What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?
16. What do you value most in a friendship?
17. What is your most treasured memory?
18. What is your most terrible memory?
19. If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Why?
20. What does friendship mean to you?
21. What roles do love and affection play in your life?
22. Alternate sharing something you consider a positive characteristic of your partner. Share a total of five items.
23. How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people’s?
24. How do you feel about your relationship with your mother?
25. Make three true “we” statements each. For instance, “We are both in this room feeling … ”
26. Complete this sentence: “I wish I had someone with whom I could share … ”
27. If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know.
28. Tell your partner what you like about them; be very honest this time, saying things that you might not say to someone you’ve just met.
29. Share with your partner an embarrassing moment in your life.
30. When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself?
31. Tell your partner something that you like about them already.
32. What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?
33. If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven’t you told them yet?
34. Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why?
35. Of all the people in your family, whose death would you find most disturbing? Why?
36. Share a personal problem and ask your partner’s advice on how he or she might handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen.
*I’m serious, if you have a friend I’d love to try this experiment out!
Categories: People & Places