People & Places

My Reverse Bucket List; 8 Things I WON’T Be Doing Before I Die!

reverse bucket list

There are so many lists out here on the blogosphere and every week I’m overwhelmed with goals like; “my 50 amazing monthly blog goals” or “21 things I want to do before I’m 21″et cetera, et cetera. I think these lists are fabulous but a little scary and for some reason I find it easier to focus on the things I don’t want to do (call me a pessimist) so when I read Sonia’s (from Life Love and Hiccups) post about her list of 8 things she won’t be doing before she dies, a reverse bucket list if you will, I completely identified with her!

Let’s face it dollface, I’m not highly adventurous am I? Sure, sure I like to travel and seek out funsies and make fabulous memories BUT more often than not they’re safe activities that don’t require signing a waiver in case of death. I like to think that I’d never say never, because you never know what happens in this crazy life, but I’m pretty safe to say I won’t be doing these particular things in the near future…

  1. I SHALL NOT BE SCALING THE HIGHEST OF HEIGHTS! I’ve tried dollface, I really have but I just DO NOT like heights and I won’t be doing anything rash like climbing the Sydney Harbour Bridge or jumping out of a plane EVER! The sheer terror that comes over me and the desire to die IMMEDIATELY doesn’t really appeal to me funnily enough. Don’t let the photo below fool you! There I am standing on top of the Empire State Building and I was dying for the photo to be taken so I could run back to the safety of the indoors. I honestly could have vomited and pooped myself at the same time – YUCK!
  2. AND THIS INCLUDES YOUR STUPID RIDES time and time again I’ve jumped on those rides at the show or theme parks thinking that this may be the time when I’ll enjoy them but NO it’s not, and I never do. You can take your Big Dippers and Pirate Ships and shove them up your arse. I would much rather have a seat and drink myself into oblivion than jump on a ride again….except the Dodgem Cars, they are perfectly acceptable!
  3. THERE’S NOT A CHANCE I’LL BE GOING DEEP SEA DIVING ANY TIME SOON Open. Water. These two words scare the crap out of me and I can tell you right now I will not be taking a cruise with you or do something ridiculously stupid like go scuba diving. The actual idea of being stuck out at sea and drowning is making hyperventilate a little now as I type this so you can imagine what I’d be like on a boat. No. Thanks!
  4. I WANT MY FIREWORKS AND I WON’T BE SETTLING FOR SECOND BEST Ugh, why do married or partnered up people always suggest that single gals just find someone and settle down? Basically they’re asking me to settle because, god forbid, I might end up alone and childless OMG! THE HORROR!! THINK OF THE CHILDREN! No, I will not accept that. I will not be settling for any old bloke that comes along, and by that I don’t mean “old” because y’all know I love me a silver fox! I want my fairy tale, I want my fireworks. That is all!
  5. THERE’S NO CHANCE IN HELL I’LL BE SENDING YOU A NUDE SELFIE Just no!
  6. YOU AND YOUR PYRAMID SCHEMES CAN TAKE A HIKE! Ever had that “friend” that suggests you should join in their fabulous money making venture *ahem, ARBONNE, ahem*? If it really were making you a ton of money why do you still have a full time job? I’m sorry, but I shall not be joining you in roping 5 friends who tell 5 friends who tell…..I’m way too lazy for that shit!
  7. JUST BECAUSE I LOVE FOOD DOES NOT MEAN I’LL BE EATING CHICKEN FEET this also goes for intestines, livers, brains and the like. If you want me to eat them they better be deep fried and doused in hot sauce because YUCK!
  8. I WILL NEVER STICK A FILTHY CANCER STICK IN MY MOUTH AGAIN Honestly, it’s 2016, who the fuck is still smoking and thinking it’s a great idea?

look of terror

What about you dollface? Do you have anything on your reverse bucket list??

31 replies »

  1. Good for you for quitting! I quit smoking this year. Very hard, but I believe it is worth it 🙂 Managed to stop whilst living in a house of smokers which was SO HARD! But I did it and haven’t looked back. I used patches at first, but actually had a very bad reaction to them. They gave me very bad joint pain so I just stopped using them – risky yes, but I haven’t had one and it has been a month. Now I just have to deal with the weight that has crept up.

  2. I love roller coasters and I want to jump out of a plane one day. I will never go deep sea diving, but I do want to take a cruise. I love things that terrify me. lol But YES! 100% on not settling for anyone. I have heard it time and time again that my standards are too high and I just need to settle for someone. No thanks. I like to think marriage is something you do once, not a million times before you land a good guy. I will stick to being single if that is what it takes. Though I would love to eventually have a few kids running around calling me mommy. And thank you for being one of the classy women that say no to a nude selfie. It sickens me how many celebrities have nudes floating around that they claim was hacked from their private accounts. Should have never been there to begin with!

    I can’t sympathize with you about smoking though. I smoked for a month when I was 17 (only to impress I guy I was into. I was such an idiot) and I wouldn’t do it again. I didn’t like it at all and it ended as soon as I stopped hanging out with the friends that gave them to me. Both of my parents smoke though, so I get plenty of second hand smoke. Ugh.

    • Oh you’re way more adventurous than me Heather!! While you’re jumping out of planes I’ll wait to hear all about it as I’m settled in on the couch with a cup of tea LOL!
      I just don’t get the thrill of sending nude pics – if you wanna see me nude it’s an “in the flesh” policy and if you need a memento well, you’ll just have to have a great memory LOL!! xo

  3. As I read every thing you wouldn’t do, I was saying, ‘YES’ to everything haha. I’m petrified of heights and rides. I’ll only go on a ride if someone is there to hold my hand and I feel I can trust that the ride won’t break (like at Disneyland) but I can’t guarantee that my eyes will be open hahaha

  4. I love this list. Mine is pot holing or caving (whatever you want to call it). I went black water rafting in New Zealand and that was scary enough! The idea of crawling through caves scares the hell out of me!!

  5. HAHAHA! Babe I loved this post so much! Fabulous idea, the reverse bucket list. I’m not jumping out of a goddamn plane for ANY reason. Adventure sports are not necessary for me. I’m black, and being black is adventure enough LOL. And settling for someone’s dusty boring uncle instead of searching for my Idris Elba clone? Never! P.s. I think I took that photo of you at the Empire State Building, and I know you were dying inside but you were totes brave. FIERCE ♥

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